Tuesday, November 30, 2004

 
Stop hiding from me. Twice, I saw you turn around and head the other way as you saw me coming. Once, I saw you dart into the bathroom. Yes, you owe me some research. But, no, it's not urgent, and I wasn't going to ask you for it today. That's why I didn't e-mail you. That's why I didn't call you. I don't need it today. It's busy-work anyway. Mostly because I don't think you're very bright. Yet you seem frightened. I can only assume this means the research isn't going well. I haven't asked about it. But apparently you think I will, and so you're trying to avoid me. Stop it. It's noticeable, and it only makes me want to make your life worse. Finish the research. Take your time. I won't say a word about it. But then, when you send it to me, I'll realize that in fact I didn't give you some of the most important details. So you'll have to start again. Oh well. Another late night in the office. That's what you get for hiding from me. Be a man. Stand up straight. Do your work, and do it well. I'm not playing games.

But I did like your shirt today. Where did you buy it?

Comments:
Hiding from you? Clearly you don't recognize the look of Olestra-induced incontinence. The frightened look had less to do with that ridiculous assignment than the sheer terror one feels whilst experiencing sphincter-seepage in the workplace.
 
AL, I'm probably going to get a lot of crap for saying this, but I think you should disable comments. What you write is entertaining and all that, and there are a few commenters who post worthwhile comments, but the good comments are greatly outweighed by the bad ones, by all the twaddle that's posted. It's not at all that I disagree with the bad comments, but that much of it is simply not worth reading. (Perhaps like this one, no doubt someone will quip.) It's sort of like watching Oliver Stone's Alexander the Great -- you expect some insight, or an interesting perspective on the man, or at least a few good battles, but instead you end up wondering why you wasted the time to sit through and watch such a disaster.
 
Uh, AL, instead of telling all of this to us, why don't you tell it to the associate? Playing games is exactly what you are doing. And you complain about the associate not being a man?
 
i agree to disable comments. the reason why most of these people comment anonymously is because they dont really have anything intelligent to say. if they did, then they would probably not do so anonymously, except for me. My comments are intelligent.
 
AL:

It could be that he's a wimp. But it could also be that he didn't want to get another assignment from you while he's working on the first, or that he simply doesn't like you.

If you were him, you wouldn't like you either.

The key to doing the Bigfirm associate thing without losing your mind is NEVER TALK TO PARTNERS if you can avoid it. Collect your checks, pay off your loans, then get out of there as soon as you can.
 


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