Monday, July 11, 2005

One of our most aged partners, who should have retired years ago but has nothing to retire to, sent out an e-mail a couple of weeks ago asking for assistance with a relatively delicate assignment.

"I recently misplaced a fairly personal item, and it is somewhat embarrassing to have to ask my secretary to type out this electronic message to send to the summer associate list, but I am requesting your assistance. In the office yesterday, I appear to have misplaced my lower dentures. Under normal circumstances, I would have assumed I left them at home, but I recall eating a peanut butter sandwich for lunch, and could not have done so without my teeth; before I left the office I noticed them missing. Therefore, they must be somewhere in the building. I attended a meeting in the 18th floor conference room, as well as visiting a number of offices on the 17th floor. I thought this might be a good assignment, if any summer associates are finding themselves with little to do this afternoon. If you find them, there will be a reward in the form of an exciting tax-related assignment that I could use someone's help on. The assignment will provide exposure to some of the firm's more prominent tax attorneys and will be a good experience for any summers interested in tax. If no one finds the teeth, the assignment will be up for grabs to any interested summer. Tell my secretary if you are interested and she will keep you posted. Thank you for your assistance."

This was a number of weeks ago. No one found them. This afternoon he came into my office, gleaming. "I wanted to tell you to inform the summers the offer is no longer open. I was pulling a book from my shelf, and, lo and behold, I found my teeth. Right there on my shelf! Tell the summers the tax assignment is still available though. Why is nobody ever interested in tax law?"

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