Anonymous Lawyer

I'm in the office early because we're working with local counsel on a matter in a small East Coast city. Think Baltimore, but it's not Baltimore. Whenever we work with local counsel, I like to take an antihistamine right before the phone call. This way I'll talk slower and slur my words a little bit so they understand me. Their minds all work in a different gear than the rest of us. If they didn't, of course they'd be in a real city. No legitimate corporate lawyer chooses to be in Atlanta or Boston or Detroit or Dallas. Why would anyone choose to work with second-tier clients, second-tier colleagues, and in second-tier office buildings with second-tier artwork on the walls and second-tier views from the balcony? Who cares if you can see the Hartford skyline? Who wants to see the Hartford skyline? Who wants to work where the most expensive lunch you can charge the client is $20 and it's at Applebee's? Anonymous Wife made friends once with a couple who invited us to eat with them at Applebee's. We weren't friends after that.

One of my associates was in early also. I saw the light on in his office as I was coming down the hall and I stopped in to see what he was working on. He said he got engaged over the weekend. His first engagement. That's cute. He said he fears she's marrying him for his money. Only knowing what I know, I can't say I disagree. She's not marrying him for his legal skills, I know that for sure. Or if she is, she's in for a terrible disappointment the first time she gives him an assignment.